Wikinews talk:Briefs/April 14, 2012

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Re "US Secret Service agents relieved in light of alleged misconduct"[edit]

This item is not ready. (One could easily see this being expanded just a little into a standalone article, btw.) I don't expect to be able to review this Shorts collection in full (very sorry), but had noted these things about this one item.

  • It's misleading to say the service declined to comment on the nature of the allegations, since although they evidently so declined, Jon Adler who has some official status did make some comment on them.
  • The first sentence of the second paragraph needs redone, as there are lots of sources for prostitution being involved, including aforementioned Jon Adler.
  • Obama's remark "when asked to comment on the matter" was about a different matter (the incident in 2009); I also btw can't verify, from the source, it was actually said when asked comment on the matter.

--Pi zero (talk) 20:50, 14 April 2012 (UTC)[reply]

I've rewritten the entire second paragraph of the short to eliminate the erroneously quoted material, as I couldn't find a simple way to incorporate it into a short, and replaced it with a sentence detailing his trip. I also removed the bit saying the agency declined to comment, per your reasoning. That should about take care of the issues (with that short anyway). Tyrol5 (talk) 21:13, 14 April 2012 (UTC)[reply]

Review of revision 1469429 [Passed][edit]