Comments by reviewer:1) Lots of runon sentences. Less commas, more periods:). 2) Don't use your thesaurus too much. Just because words are nearly synonymous doesn't mean they mean exactly the same thing. Also, simple words are usually better than long, complex words (though there are exceptions). Don't obsitficate your writing unnecessarily. Clarity over complexity, always. Oh, and Darmak and Jalard, at Tenagra. 3) Always make sure everything you say is properly sourced. 4) Always make sure your sentences mean what you want them to mean. In one case you implied that people would be able to send mass bluetooth messages using facebook, when you actually meant that *police* would be able to send mass bluetooth messages asking people to report about a specific crime in their area that had just occurred. 5) A semicolon is used in place of a period (more or less). Don't use them as colons or commas, because that's wrong.
The reviewed revision should automatically have been edited by removing {{Review}} and adding {{Publish}} at the bottom, and the edit sighted; if this did not happen, it may be done manually by a reviewer.
Comments by reviewer:1) Lots of runon sentences. Less commas, more periods:). 2) Don't use your thesaurus too much. Just because words are nearly synonymous doesn't mean they mean exactly the same thing. Also, simple words are usually better than long, complex words (though there are exceptions). Don't obsitficate your writing unnecessarily. Clarity over complexity, always. Oh, and Darmak and Jalard, at Tenagra. 3) Always make sure everything you say is properly sourced. 4) Always make sure your sentences mean what you want them to mean. In one case you implied that people would be able to send mass bluetooth messages using facebook, when you actually meant that *police* would be able to send mass bluetooth messages asking people to report about a specific crime in their area that had just occurred. 5) A semicolon is used in place of a period (more or less). Don't use them as colons or commas, because that's wrong.
The reviewed revision should automatically have been edited by removing {{Review}} and adding {{Publish}} at the bottom, and the edit sighted; if this did not happen, it may be done manually by a reviewer.
