Talk:Bus crash in Ocoña District of Peru costs over 40 lives

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Thoughts on focus[edit]

The headline atm describes a process rather than a specific event.

The lede atm says inquiries have pointed out such-and-such. Whose inquiries, and when and how did some specific event take place that allowed us to know this? (If there was an announcement, and that announcement is the focal event of the article, telling us about that announcement is the core concern of the lede, and the accident, which is obviously essential here, is essential because it is what the focal event relates to. --Pi zero (talk) 14:18, 22 February 2018 (UTC)

Not the announcement, but the investigation into the accident must be considered as the focal event at which the lede focuses. For the rest, I have chosen to focus on the investigation because the accident which happened now almost 2 days ago would already soon be "stale" here. Actually, I would have preferred to focus altogether on the accident itself, but your strict "freshness" policy makes this rather problematic. The conclusion that the driver fell asleep can be found back here, but it is not mentioned who exactly performed those inquiries. So that can't be told here either. De Wikischim (talk) 14:31, 22 February 2018 (UTC)
An investigation is not an event, it's a process. As WN:Specific explains (yes, this goes by quickly, but it's hugely important), an earthquake is a specific event, whereas continental drift is not (though the release of a report about continental drift is a specific event). --Pi zero (talk) 16:20, 22 February 2018 (UTC)
@Pi zero: The accident itself is the main focus now. The title has been changed (back) accordingly, as well as the text structure, especially the lede. De Wikischim (talk) 16:29, 22 February 2018 (UTC)


Don't forget to capitalize after the colon in the title. --SVTCobra 23:47, 23 February 2018 (UTC)

Review of revision 4386254 [Passed][edit]